It's been a long couple of weeks and much has happened. On Wednesday, December 21st Emma had her first set of immunization shots. Elena requested that I attend because she did not feel comfortable bringing her to the doctor alone. My role, which I gladly accepted, was to provide moral support to Elena. There are not many occasions during a pregnancy when a man feels useful, so now, post-birth, opportunities like this are golden. To be the "rock" during stressful times, I was really going to earn my wings here. Although I was not looking forward to Emma getting an injection, it is one of those things that every child goes through and would be too young to ever remember. It's also one of those things whereby the rewards outweigh the risks. Being a man of science and reason I had rationalized the whole thing in my mind, accepted and made peace with it. All babies need their shots. Emma is a baby. Emma needs her shots. The logic does not get purer than that. It was so logical it could have been an SAT question. In any event, after waiting an hour at the doctor's office we were finally taken into a room. The Doctor performed her checkup and gave Emma a clean bill of health (albeit she is a bit on the chunky side). She explained the shots that would be administered and then bid us farewell and left the room. Every child we know that goes to this doctor loves her and it is clear why. She is the nicest, warmest, most pleasant, nurturing person you will ever meet. She takes extreme care when handling the children under her care and interacts with them in a friendly and loving way. That, and she doesn't administer the shots. She leaves that job to the nurse. Clearly a well thought out strategy. Within minutes, the nurse entered the room with a tray filled with needles. Five in all. I thought to myself how this was going to suck for poor Emma but I knew Elena and I would be there for her to hold her when it was over and that she would not remember a thing, just as boys don't remember their circumcision when performed at birth. In fact my first recollection of life only goes back to the age of five and those memories are vague at best.

The nurse, who is also extremely pleasant, was wearing her festive Santa hat, asked if we would hold Emma's arms. The shots would be administered in her thigh but it was our job to help hold her still, or at least provide Emma with a familiar and comforting touch. Both Elena and I approached Emma and laid our hands on her. Elena standing to Emma's side, and me behind Emma's head. My hands laid gently on Emma's shoulders and Elena's hand on Emma's belly. Once we were all in position the nurse proceeded to spring into action. With methodical precision she removed the cap from the first syringe and plunged it into Emma's quadricep. Emma's eyes went wide and a startled expression enveloped her tiny little face. Before she could even register the sensation of what she had just experienced a second syringe had been plunged into her same thigh. With this there was no mistake that what she had experienced a second ago was something she had never experienced before in her short little life.... Pain. Like a volcanic eruption the blood rushed to her head as she instinctively and urgently prepared to broadcast an important message to us. Pain ridden and gut wrenching the message was delivered loud and clear. "WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I had heard Emma utter this word hundreds of times before, and despite being the same, its cadence and emphasis was different. It was louder, more urgent, and more desperate than any other time she had exclaimed it. It cut through my very core and instantly brought me emotionally to my knees. I was stunned now as well, as if someone had taken a 2x4 and blind-sided me in the back of the head. My eyes now swelled with tears as the nurse pulled the cap off the next syringe with her teeth, like the pin of a grenade, and plunged it deep into her other thigh. Emma quickly forced out another frantic cry and I was bludgeoned once again. I wanted to be strong, I expected to be strong, but I was overcome by this experience as well. In rapid succession the nurse finished her remaining two inoculations. Emma tried desperately to communicate to us the words, "Make it stop! It hurts!" but only " WAHHHHHHHH!!!" came out; and I, on the verge of collapse and a potential fetal curl maintained my legs and just stood behind Emma with tears streaming down my cheeks. Elena had remained surprisingly strong during the ordeal and I ended up being more of a liability than an asset in this whole thing. When all was said and done, Elena swooped her baby off the table and held her close to her body while Emma let out another 30 seconds of wails. During this time I asked Elena to let me hold her because "Emma needed to be held!", I exclaimed but she denied my request. I was in no condition to hold Emma and Elena realized that. After a couple of minutes, when we both calmed down, Elena handed Emma over to me where I proceeded to apologetically kiss her beet red head and puffy little eyes. Emma rested her head on my chest in a comforted and trusting manner as if to say, "I forgive you Dad" and all was good again. Looking back I don't know what it was about the experience that affected me so. Perhaps it was the first time I had heard Emma cry in pain. Perhaps it was because she was crying for help and due to the nature of the procedure all I could do was stand by and watch. Perhaps I wanted Emma to know that I was not happy with the situation either and that I shared in her pain. Or maybe it was all of the above. Either way, it was a new experience for us all and I am glad that I was there to share in the experience and grow a little more as a family. Next month Elena wants to get Emma's ears pierced. I think I will sit that one out. ;)

Thankfully Emma did not have any adverse reaction to the immunization shots. For the first two days everything seemed nominal. Then on the third day following her shots, Elena left to Publix to pick up some groceries and Emma went a little crazy on me. She cried and fussed the whole time. When Elena returned she asked the standard question, "How was Emma?" and I told her what had transpired. I am sure Elena thought it was just me because the behavior I described was quite unusual for Emma. Needless to say, her spell continued on with Elena and lasted the next three days where she was inconsolable and even exhibited a diminished hunger. On Christmas Eve (Day 2 of her spell) we traveled to our families for the usual gathering and celebration, but Emma was not having it. She cried the whole time at Great Aunt Araceli's house and seemed to only calm down if I held her and walked around. She loves being held close to the body and for that body to be in motion (i.e. walking, rocking, etc.). By the time we got to my parent's house Emma was in a slightly better mood and allowed others to hold her. There she met her Aunt Diana for the first time. All in all things went well. We had lechon (which is a marinated and baked pork delicacy that my sister's boyfriend Bastien made). It was delicious! Emma's Grandparents also announced that they had set up a 529 College fund for Emma and Aunt Jennifer had already contributed to it as part of her Christmas gift to her. Emma received a lot of nice gifts from both families.

When we left my parents house to head home it was already about 11:30 PM at night. We placed Emma in her car seat and started the hour drive home. Emma started throwing a fit immediately and I sat in the back with her trying to calm her. It took me 15 minutes to get her to close her eyes and start sleeping. In a whisper I told Elena how high maintenance Emma was and Emma, as if she had heard me, began to wail. I worked with Emma for another 10 minutes and finally got her to close her eyes once again. Once quiet, Elena and I knew that we would have to remain silent throughout the remainder of the trip. Emma runs a tight ship.

Christmas Day arrived and Emma awoke with her eyebrows slanted down toward the bridge of her nose. We knew it wasn't going to be the Christmas Day we had imagined it would be, but we got the video camera out and began taping our precious Emma as we opened the lovely gifts that Santa had brought for her. After opening the first one it quickly became apparent that Emma was not having it (Christmas that is). She started crying and fussing, and just like that Christmas was over. After we calmed her down Elena and I opened the gifts we got for each other. This year Elena got a laptop computer for Christmas. Over the years Elena has bought me two computers and until now had never been the recipient of a brand spanking new one of her own. She typically gets my hand-me-downs, which is not a bad thing by the way, as I typically put together monstrosities. In any event, this year would be different. Elena was going to know what it felt like to open the box of her very own computer. I knew if I were to purchase this for her I would have to do it on a budget or risk getting my butt kicked. I also wanted it to be powerful enough that if I needed to, I could run one of my games on it and it would not bring it to its knees. I am proud to say that I met both of those requirements and built her a $2,100 Dell system for $1,350. It has a sweet 17" wide display, 1 Gig of RAM, a 60 Gig hard drive, a 256 MB GeForce Video card, a 2.0 Giga Hertz Micro processor, a CD Writer/DVD combo drive, 802.11g wireless built in, etc. It is a sweet little system purchased at a sweet price. My secret... XPBargains. XPBargains is a site that scours the internet for deals and combinations of deals and posts them on their site on a regular basis. Many times companies like Dell have so many promotions going that they inadvertently give things away for less than they would like because one deal can be combined with another. In my case this was not so, but XPBargains did have a coupon code for $750 off an Inspiron Notebook of $1,999 or more. So I built a system as close to $2,000 as possible, so I could take advantage of it, and get the best value possible.

Today Elena and I took down our Christmas tree and all our decorations in preparation for the new year. Elena cooked three meals in preparation for my return to work (Picadillo, a split pea soup, and chilli). Needless to say the house smelled delicious all day making it difficult to concentrate on anything. I have spent the last three nights on Emma watch and I am happy to say that Emma has returned to her old self, eating and fussing at her normal pace. She is also sleeping for longer spans at night and with more consistency. Now she goes to bed at around 12:00 AM and wakes at 5:30 AM. Then she will sleep from around 6:30 AM to 10:00 AM. Her internal clock is starting to align with ours which is a good thing.

Well, I have said too much already so I will leave it at that. It's 9:30 PM and Emma is sleeping in her swing watching the U2 DVD I got for Christmas. I am going to take a shower and prepare for the New Year. I know, it's a bit late in the day for my shower but better late than never. This has been quite an eventful year for us. We vacationed to Italy and got the best gift a family could ask for, a happy, healthy little girl. Have a great and safe New Year from our family to yours!!!